Managing a Micromanager

This has taken some time to actually admit to myself and others. I know it will come as a shock to my near & dear ones <<SARCASM  but I am a control freak. not so much the loud, aggressive HERE I AM  kind of control freak, but the gentle, persistent, behind the scenes -do it the right way or don't do it at all (and when i say right way i mean my way. (because in all honesty, i know you know that at the end of it all, it really is the best, most efficient way) )[see what i mean..]  

I am a creature of habit. I always will be. 

I do not want to micromanage my daughters life. this is SO important to me. I am terribly fearful of driving a wedge between us by being too controlling. I feel like I am constantly telling her "no".  I HATE IT  She tests me now, constantly. I am not ready to discipline her, I dont even know where or how to start!  I feel like consistency is an important factor when raising a child. I know I want to talk with her, not at her or for her. This is a change that has to happen within myself as well. We are both learning.  I want to teach her boundaries and reason with her, then let her make her own decisions.  I want to hold her hand and gently guide her through life, not give her a list of do's & don'ts with a how-to manual. I know she is only still a baby, so it probably sounds silly to most folks, but from day one we are building a foundation for these little souls,  We only get so many year of this before they fly the nest & years go by so quickly once they enter the world.
I want her to feel free to fill her life with the purest desires of her heart.

I know Cody is enjoy a much needed break from my hovering and constant correcting. I don't do it with foul intentions, honest. It's not that I'm trying to say "no stop! you're wrong. do it this way" ..... okay. well, maybe I am..... I just feel like if I can contribute to making your life a bit easier, well then why not do so. Muffin, if you read this ever, thank you for accepting this about me and putting me in my place when it needs to be done. you are my balance - in so many more ways than you will ever know. I vow to be more conscience of my actions and not so much up your ass. BUT PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD HANG UP YOUR WET TOWEL AFTER YOU SHOWER XO I'm sure he had just about lost his marbles when it came to me and my habit ... I really wouldn't even call it a bad habit, just something that I need to be aware of, something I need let go of sometimes. something I would like to have control of , rather the other way around. Admitting it is the first step right??